Almost a year ago, I created a blog draft that I entitled “Lessons from my Quarantine.” In the post, I intended to write a list of everything I learned while quarantining at home. Some of the things on the list were small life skills - like learning to cook excellent beans from scratch, to moisturize my face and hands more often, and to use my bialetti correctly for better coffee. Other things were more philosophical: as the pandemic grew, I spent a lot of time thinking about the concept of humility and what it means to be humbled by something. The experience of sitting quietly at home while a massive, phenomenon rushed around the world forced me to recognize the few things I can control and the many things I can’t. It was and continues to be truly humbling.
I even included on the list a few things that I intended to do during the quarantine - like polishing my french skills and establishing a morning workout routine. A year later, I don’t know whether to admire my ambitious goals or to regret the capitalism I’ve internalized that pushes me to look for productivity in every spare moment. As I learned to flex with the chaotic nature of the pandemic, I also came to peace with the realization that there was no way I could accomplish everything I wanted to - whether due to lack of energy or motivation - and, more significantly, that there was no need to.
Don’t get me wrong - the last 3 months have been particularly hard. Seattle’s dark winter and extensive pandemic closures led to many dark, indoor days. In work and in life there have been challenges and bright spots. I miss my sister who moved to California, but I treasure the days we spent together over the holidays. I mourn lost professional opportunities, but I cherish new connections and ideas. I watch restaurant closures with sadness, but I love finding new cafes, bakeries, and take-out options that I can safely consume. I am thankful for everything I have, but 2020 still left a bittersweet taste in my mouth.
Last year I worked through a rigorous reflection and goal setting process. Even with the quarantine, I made great progress on some of those goals. This year I don’t plan on doing anything like that. The future feels particularly fragile right now: is it bending towards a better, more equitable world? towards a more chaotic, despotic world? or shattering into a hundred billion pieces? I don’t want to set specific goals because I want to be open to change.
Instead of goals, I’d like to set intentions. Regardless of where the world goes, where do I want to go? Where do I want to contribute? Where do I want to devote my energy? Throughout 2020, I felt disconnected from my friends, hobbies, and passions. By taking a step back and thinking about the things that really matter to me - agnostic to work or life circumstances - I hope to ground myself in the things that make me truly happy and put me on course towards my north star. Below, I divided my life into 4 quadrants and wrote a few intentions as succinctly as possible.
Career
Strategy & Ownership: I want to create and oversee strategy and own projects/teams.
Authentic Mission & Vision: I want to work with organizations that are driven by strong missions. I want to learn how to craft and implement good missions & visions when they’re missing.
Location: I want to live and work in inspiring, global cities.
Relationships
Family: Whether quiet moments, shared meals, painting, or housework, I want to be mindful about the time I spend with family - and say “I love you” more.
Friends: I want to give more compliments, more gifts, and - when allowed - more hugs.
Passions
Food & Hospitality: I love food and restaurants. I am not sure if I would ever pursue this professionally, but I want to center cooking and eating in my everyday life.
Cities: I want to learn about urban design and transportation and help others learn too.
Wellness: I want to be healthy and fit - my brain, my body, and my emotional health.
World
Local Change: National politics are painful and will probably continue to be. I feel more confident about change in my city and state. I commit to staying informed and advocating for change.
Please hold me accountable. If I’m hung up on some little thing, remind me to take a step back. I’ll do the same for you.
I am confident hope is on the horizon; I look forward to the new year with optimism and excitement. I have my gloomy days like everyone, but I am thankful that my sunny disposition always returns, just as the sun always breaks through the Seattle clouds and shines down on me. Sending love to the world.